Aim For The Moon

I preformed a dressage test… In the dark… Without a horse.

When horse loving kids find themselves horseless, in an arena, it isn't uncommon to see them become their inner pony and kick up their heels. You might watch as the children complete circles of a well preformed trot and canter, and for a young dressage enthusiast, maybe a passage, piaffe, or extended trot. In a horseless arena with jumps, the young horse lovers compete over fences, complete with lead changes and looking for their next fence. I remember those days very well and have often, while teaching lessons, found myself trotting and cantering a dressage test for a student or cantering strides to work on timing for a fence. I always end laughing.

I've often wondered why an adult isn't allowed to find their inner pony and run wildly around the ring. Maybe it's because as a whole, horse people are already believed to be crazy and we don't need to add any additional reasons for people to believe it. Or maybe, it's because somewhere between being a horse-crazy child and becoming a horse-crazy adult, we let our dreams take a backseat to life.

I began thinking about this as I practiced flying lead changes down the centerline. I only vaguely remember my dreams from back then and know they have changed greatly. My dreams are more realistic and boring now. No, that's wrong, they are worse then realistic and boring, they are overly safe and littered with excuses as to why I'm not aiming higher. I've become more afraid of trying and failing than I am of barely trying at all and never accomplishing anything. I would never allow one of my students to do this, my expectations for them have always been higher, why am I allowing myself to do this? Just as I was thinking this, I tripped over my own foot and went into the dirt.

I had fallen. What is my rule? When you fall, unless you've hurt more then your pride, you dust yourself off, take a deep breath and get back on. I needed to follow my own advice. I needed to learn to lead by example again. I stood up, laughed at my clumsy self, found my inner wild pony, and galloped away, wondering what goals I would set for myself. If you aim for the moon and only make it halfway, you will still make it farther than if you had aimed for the backyard and made it. I've decided to aim for the moon and if I don't make it, that's OK.